A Tale Of Two Girlies In Sephora

Thoughts on browsing the fragrance aisle with teens and tweens

She flits from aisle to aisle, her iPhone right in front of her mouth. She has a friend on speaker phone, asking her opinion on what she should get as she browses make-up and skincare. She has long brown hair that covers a small backpack slung over her shoulders, a white tank and jean shorts. 

I stride through the aisles wearing a Free People dupe lounge set — a short sleeved sweater, flowy white pants, gold jewelry, black sunnies with a black bag to match and a slicked back pony. I feel put together, confident, and had just spritzed Maison Margiela on my wrists after reading an article that said Lazy Sunday Morning has the same vibes as a crisp, white t-shirt freshly laundered. I’m not so sure about that, but I am sure that the fragrance on my wrists made me feel even more rich and luxurious than I already did. 

I have a very specific memory of my favorite aunt wearing strong perfume, and breathing her in on summer vacations as I rode in the back of her BMW. Spending summers with my aunt and uncle were some of my first memories of people having more money than my family did. Not in a bad way, it was just that my mom (or any other woman in my life, really) never smelled like fragrance. I later realized as an adult that my brain connects perfume to being affluent.

Fragrance evokes memories of  going on shopping sprees and receiving fun gifts from my aunt just because. It’s that one time I was at the Ritz Carlton for my grandparents 50th wedding anniversary. Was it even the Ritz? I literally don’t know, I just remember smelling perfume and feeling fancy in a pretty hotel. It’s recognizing elegance before I even knew what it was. It’s pretty glass bottles resting on vanities. Fragrance is feminine and luxurious and uplifting. And now, it’s for cosplaying as a wealthy woman. You don’t have to spend gobs of money to smell good, of course, but fragrance will always make me think of my aunt, and it will always make me feel abundant. And walking through Sephora in my lounge set made me feel content, uplifted, confident. 

Until I saw this girl and her phone. 

No doubt she was in high school, and I couldn’t help but think of myself at her age. Before stopping my racing thoughts of “Back in my day, I didn’t know anything about Sephora and makeup!” I felt a pang of… I dunno, cringe? A glaring realization that I’m 37 years old? Closer to 40 than I’ve ever been? 40?! Omg.

I know girls are growing up now with TikTok, get ready with me videos and influencers chatting to their phones while doing their makeup and skincare, which is why I see girls that keep getting younger and younger browsing the aisles of these stores. But it floors me that I always go to thoughts of, “Oh God, I’m old” instead of “Damn, I’m a confident, glowing, radiant woman who smells good with a job and a husband,” when I pass middle schoolers browsing Glossier lip glosses.  And I’m floored that these girls are dropping money on things like Drunk Elephant skincare. I had Cetaphil and Maybelline Dream Matte Mousse from CVS in high school and that was literally it. Geez Louise!

The girl and her phone continued to bounce from aisle to aisle as she chatted loudly with her friend. As she made her way to the checkout line, I overheard her friend say, “Well, why don’t you get both?” I’m not sure what both things were, but her response was simply, “My mom said I have a $30 limit.” And my heart softened.

 I don’t know why I compare myself to girls younger than I am and get fearful of being out of touch, old and ultimately judged by the younger generation. It’s like when Barbie talks to the girls in the cafeteria in the Barbie movie. I was crying right along with her as the tween girl ripped Barbie apart. I wanted to shout, Why are you being so mean? Leave Barbie alone! As I secretly imagined this tween girl yelling at me. But realizing this girl probably doesn’t have a job of her own and is still relying on her mother’s money brought me back to Earth. I’m the one who has a job, makes her own money, is wearing a cute outfit, smells good, and is living in her wealthy woman fantasy. There’s no need to pine for my high school days, my college days, or even my 20s. Because listen, I’m in my 30s and there’s no time like the present. And no shade to this sweet high schooler bopping around Sephora with her friend on the phone. I believe she spent her $30 on Sol de Janeiro body spray, and girl, that’s a solid choice, I literally have it too. We can both smell good and live our best lives. Women supporting women, amirite?

And maybe it's okay for me to compare my high school self to this current high schooler. I didn’t grow up with social media in high school, I wasn’t influenced by lengthy skincare rituals or makeup tutorials. The only reason I’m this put together at 37 is because of the influencers I follow. Social media is a wealth of inspiration, as well as a pit of loneliness and glossy unrealistic life portrayals, and I just hope it can stay a positive experience for everyone, but especially for high school girls. 

The girl hangs up the phone and strides out of the store with a small black and white Sephora bag in tow. I also walked out of the store, leaving a trail of fragrance behind me, no Sephora bag this time. And really, if I had the opportunity to switch places with this young woman, I wouldn’t. I’ll take the cutie in the elevated lounge set ending her Friday night happy hour with a stroll through the fragrance aisle instead.